If you have learned the basics of Human Design then you know your energy affects the people around you and vice versa. Well, there is a beautiful feature of Human Design that allows us to do connection charts and family charts to truly see the impact people have on each other.
Having a connection chart done can help you navigate your relationships with more ease, understanding, and compassion. I find a lot of times in life we lack the words to explain something to a friend, partner, or child, or we feel too vulnerable to express the words we are thinking. Human Design gives you the language to find a deeper understanding of what is going on energetically. Then when we talk to our loved ones about these things it can provide both clarity and a different lens to have difficult conversations through. It takes the ego out of it so hard talks don't feel so personal or hurtful when you can say "Well looking at this through the lens of human design, it looks like this is why we struggle with..."
I find it a really fun and interesting way to understand and discuss relationships. In Human Design there are five different connection types and they are based on how many chakra centers you have defined when you are together. When I first learned about these I thought it gave you huge insight into whether it is a good or bad relationship but that isn't true. There are many other aspects that make a relationship work or not. In Human Design there really is no bad relationship. It is all about understanding how your energy works together and how to navigate that.
The 9-0 Relationship Type
The 9 and 0, there is nowhere to go.
This refers to the mechanics of having every single center defined when you are together. There are no open centers. This can clearly be an attractive union as it can make you feel completely fulfilled and complete on one level. This doesn't mean it is a perfect relationship as there are many other things to look at within the chart.
With this connection type, you have no room for anyone else in this relationship which can actually be a challenge. You are glued together at the hip and can often feel like the rest of the world doesn't matter. Your energy as a couple can make other people feel like a third wheel, including your own children. You will tend to burn away your friendships over time. The aura you have when you are together literally pushes other people away. This can create a theme of trying to get out and socialize but you just aren't meant for that because of these relationship dynamics. This doesn't mean you should never try or go out, but it does mean that having a healthy social life and maintaining other friendships will be a challenge.
Some people may crave this type of union where your partner feels like they complete you but other people may see this as suffocating in some way and miss their other relationships and previous social life. I don't think the 9-0 relationship is perfect or what everyone in the world is looking for.
This energy can make it hard to walk away from this type of relationship. There are other dynamics that could be affecting the relationship negatively that make you want to end it. It could be an explosive relationship that is less than ideal due to your channels and hanging gates, but the 9 and 0 combination keeps pulling you back in like a magnet.
The 8-1 Relationship Type
8 and 1 let's have some fun!
Mechanically this translates to having eight centers defined and one open when you are together. The reason we say "let's have some fun" is because the one open center allows you to connect and be open to that energy together. It represents potential areas of common interests that you should explore together. It is a very healthy connection type.
If this is your relationship type I would encourage you to focus on the theme of that open center. For example, the open spleen center is about health. You could go to the gym together, take a yoga class, watch a documentary on nutrition, etc. Focus on activities that you do together that help you connect with that open center.
The 8 and 1 will be acting more independently within the relationship. The 1 open center can be seen as an open door or window that will allow you to get out of the relationship with more ease than the 9 and 0.
The 7-2 Relationship Type
7 and 2 there's work to do!
Mechanically this means that you have seven defined centers and two open centers when you are together. When you have two open centers it changes things a bit. The more open centers you have, the more potential there is for distraction from the union.
Looking at it as two open doors means you have two ways to run out and leave the relationship. If you are each moving out into the world through a different open center, you will move away from each other. This can cause any confrontation or issues to get swept under the carpet and will cause you to slowly drift apart. This means these relationships can last a very long time before you eventually decide to end things.
You do have the potential to learn a lot from each other and develop a deep union but it takes energy and effort to work through these things. If distractions are taking you away from the relationship then it is a sign that you are running away from the work that is necessary to make this relationship work. This is a relationship that requires a commitment to making it work.
The 6-3 Relationship Type
6 and 3 it's better to be free!
Well as you can see, the more open centers you have the more challenging a relationship can be. We say "better to be free" because the bond is different here. The 7 and 2 may result in marriage so they have the time together to put in the work required. The 6 and 3 however have so much distraction that they shouldn't enter into a formal bond like marriage.
This connection won't feel like the other person completes you, but it could work in an open or non-traditional relationship. You need more room to breathe and be independent here. This could still be a nice union but it is going to look different from traditional relationships.
This relationship could easily move apart. This doesn't mean walking away from this relationship. This just means you are going to be very independent within your relationship. You will spend a lot of time doing your own thing and then can come back together and have connection and union. A long-distance relationship could actually be ideal in this type of bond.
The not-self mind may think it can fix feeling like this person doesn't complete you, oftentimes by having children. The children will create more of a penta connection chart which will make you forget about the lack of connection with your partner. Then when the children leave home you are back to a relationship full of holes that may pull apart because it doesn't have as much glue holding it together.
Just like I don't think the 9-0 is a perfect relationship type for everyone, this one isn't either. I do think certain people would enjoy this type of relationship. It is up to you to decide what you are truly looking for.
5-4 Relationship Type
5 and 4, relationship no more!
Well, mechanically we know that you have 5 centers defined together and 4 open. We have seen with each connection type so far that the more open centers you have the more distance and disconnection you could feel. In this relationship, you would each have your own interests, goals, and viewpoint of the world. You may be so different from each other that you wonder why you are even together.
With this type of connection, it can take more time to get to know each other. Since you are so different you don't reveal everything at once and it takes more time to reveal all your differences. This can make the relationship interesting and it definitely won't feel boring. The question is do these truths come out and spark interesting conversations or do they create drama and conflict?
If you have both done inner work and have good self-awareness then this relationship can actually feel really alive and complete.
Now can you see why we say there is no perfect relationship type in human design?! The information I shared is only looking at one component of the chart - how your centers come together. As you can see there are pros and cons to every single connection type and we all have a different interpretation of the perfect relationship and what that looks like.
In a connection chart there are so many other things to look at that it is really important not to get caught up in these numbers and descriptions. They are only providing you with one piece of the puzzle.
If you read 6 and 3 it's better to be free, that doesn't mean you need to end things with your partner. It means you need to reflect on how that energy feels in your heart and mind. You have to understand how you can work with it better. You can't expect to fulfill all of your needs through one person, so how can you connect with your friends to find the wholeness and deep connection you may feel like you are missing?
Once you understand your connection type, it is important to start exploring other aspects of the connection chart. You will want to factor in your energy types, profile, variables, centers, gates, channels, circuitry, and both of your gene keys to really do a proper relationship or connection chart.
If you would like to schedule a 90-minute connection chart reading, I offer them live online or recorded for you to watch in your own time.